Friday, August 19, 2011

IN TEXAS...

It's a slow day in a little East Texas town. The sun is beating down, and the streets are deserted.

Times are tough, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.....

On this particular day a rich tourist from back East is driving through town. He stops at the motel and lays a $100 bill on the desk saying he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one to spend the night.

As soon as the man walks upstairs, the owner grabs the bill and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher.

The butcher takes the $100 and runs down the street to retire his debt to the pig farmer.

The pig farmer takes the $100 and heads off to pay his bill at the supplier of feed and fuel.

The guy at the Farmer's Co-op takes the $100 and runs to pay his debt to the local prostitute, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer her "services" on credit.

The hooker rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill with the hotel owner.

The hotel proprietor then places the $100 back on the counter so the rich traveler will not suspect anything.

At that moment the traveler comes down the stairs, picks up the $100 bill, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, pockets the money, and leaves town.

No one produced anything. No one earned anything.

However, the whole town is now out of debt and now looks to the future with a lot more optimism.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how the United States Government is conducting business today.

Proposed 28th Amendment to the United States Constitution:

For too long we have been complacent about the workings of Congress. Many citizens had no idea that (1) Congress members could retire with the same pay after only one term; (2) that they didn't pay into Social Security; and (3) that they specifically exempted themselves from many of the laws they have passed (such as being exempt from fear of prosecution for sexual harassment. Congress�s latest game is to exempt themselves from the Healthcare Reform Bill that is being considered. Somehow, this doesn't seem logical. We do not have an elite that is above the law.

I truly don't care if members of Congress are Democrat, Republican, independent, liberal, conservative, progressive or whatever. The self-serving must stop. The below listed proposed 28th Amendment to the U.S. Constitution would do that. This is an idea whose time has come.

Proposed 28th Amendment to the United States Constitution:

"Congress shall make no law that applies to the citizens of the United States that does not apply equally to the Senators and Representatives; and Congress shall make no law that applies to the Senators and Representatives that does not apply equally to the citizens of the United States.�

This is fair, to the point and non-partisan. Who could be against it? Congress, that�s who.

Each person receiving this is asked to forward it to a minimum of 20 people in their Address Book (using the Bcc: option) and ask each of them to do likewise. In 3 days every person in the United States will have received the message. Thanks for doing this, and thanks for contacting your congressperson and telling him or her you support this effort.

CHANGE...

There's an old sea story in the Navy about a ship's Captain who inspected his sailors, and afterward told the Chief Boatswain that his men smelled bad. The Captain suggested perhaps it would help if the sailors would change underwear occasionally.

The Chief responded, "Aye, aye sir, I'll see to it immediately!" The Chief went straight to the sailors berth deck and announced, "The Captain thinks you guys smell bad and wants you to change your underwear." He continued, "Pittman, you change with Jones, McCarthy, you change with Witkowski, and Brown, you change with Schultz. Now get to it!!!"

THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS:
Someone may come along and promise "Change", but don't count on things smelling any better.

GONORRHEA LECTIM..

Very important information has just been made public. I think it is something you should know about:

Gonorrhea Lectim
The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of this old disease.

The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim. It's pronounced "Gonna re-elect 'im."

The disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior involving putting your cranium up your rectum.

Many victims contracted it in 2008 ...... but now most people after having been infected for the past 1-2 years are starting to realize how destructive this sickness is. It's sad because it is so easily cured with a new procedure just coming on the market called Vo-tem-out!

You take the first dose/step in 2010 and the second dosage in 2012 and simply don't engage in such behavior again, otherwise it could become permanent and eventually wipe out all life as we know it.

Several states are already on top of this like Virginia and New Jersey , and apparently now Massachusetts with many more seeing the writing on the wall.

FREE HOME...

Free Home

I was in my neighborhood restaurant this morning and was seated behind a group of jubilant individuals celebrating the successful passing of the recent health care bill. I could not finish my breakfast. This is what ensued:

They were a diverse group of several races and both sexes. I heard the young man exclaim, “Isn’t Obama like Jesus Christ? I mean, after all, he is healing the sick.” The young woman enthusiastically proclaimed, “Yeah, and he does it for free. I cannot believe anyone would think that a free market would work for health care. Another said, ‘The stupid Republicans want us all to starve to death so they can inherit all of the power. Obama should be made a Saint for what he did for those of us less fortunate.” At this, I had had enough.

I arose from my seat, mustering all the restraint I could find, and approached their table. “Please excuse me; may I impose upon you for one moment?” They smiled and welcomed me to the conversation. I stood at the end of their table, smiled as best I could and began an experiment.

“I would like to give one of you my house. It will cost you no money and I will pay all of the expenses and taxes for as long as you live there. Anyone interested?” They looked at each other in astonishment. “Why would you do something like that?” asked a young man, “There isn’t anything for free in this world.” They began to laugh at me, as they did not realize this man had just made my point. “I am serious, I will give you my house for free, no money what so ever. Anyone interested?” In unison, a resounding “Hell Yeah” fills the room.

“Since there are too many of you, I will have to make a choice as to who receives this money-free bargain.” I noticed an elderly couple was paying attention to the spectacle unfolding before their eyes, the old man shaking his head in apparent disgust. “I tell you what; I will give it to the one of you most willing to obey my rules.” Again, they looked at one another, an expression of bewilderment on their faces. The perky young woman asked, “What are the rules?” I smiled and said, “I don’t know. I have not yet defined them. However, it is a free home that I offer you.” They giggled amongst themselves, the youngest of which said, “What an old coot. He must be crazy to give away his home. Go take your meds, old man.” I smiled and leaned into the table a bit further. “I am serious, this is a legitimate offer.” They gaped at me for a moment.

“I’ll take it you old fool. Where are the keys?” boasted the youngest among them. “Then I presume you accept ALL of my terms then?” I asked. The elderly couple seemed amused and entertained as they watched from the privacy of their table. “Oh hell yeah! Where do I sign up?” I took a napkin and wrote, “I give this man my home, without the burden of financial obligation, so long as he accepts and abides by the terms that I shall set forth upon consummation of this transaction.” I signed it and handed it to the young man who eagerly scratched out his signature. “Where are the keys to my new house?” he asked in a mocking tone of voice. All eyes were upon us as I stepped back from the table, pulling the keys from pocket and dangling them before the excited new homeowner.

“Now that we have entered into this binding contract, witnessed by all of your friends, I have decided upon the conditions you are obligated to adhere from this point forward. You may only live in the house for one hour a day. You will not use anything inside of the home. You will obey me without question or resistance. I expect complete loyalty and admiration for this gift I bestow upon you. You will accept my commands and wishes with enthusiasm, no matter the nature. Your morals and principles shall be as mine. You will vote as I do, think as I do and do it with blind faith. These are my terms. Here are your keys.” I reached the keys forward and the young man looked at me dumbfounded.

“Are you out of your mind? Who would ever agree to those ridiculous terms?” the young man appeared irritated. “You did when you signed this contract before reading it, understanding it and with the full knowledge that I would provide my conditions only after you committed to the agreement.” Was all I said. The elderly man chuckled as his wife tried to restrain him. I was looking at a now silenced and bewildered group of people. “You can shove that stupid deal up you’re a** old man, I want no part of it” exclaimed the now infuriated young man. “You have committed to the contract, as witnessed by all of your friends; you cannot get out of the deal unless I agree to it. I do not intend to let you free now that I have you ensnared. I am the power you agreed to. I am the one you blindly and without thought chose to enslave yourself to. In short, I am your Master.” At this, the table of celebrating individuals became a unified group against the unfairness of the deal.

After a few moments of unrepeatable comments and slurs, I revealed my true intent. “What I did to you is what this administration and congress did to you with the health care legislation. I easily suckered you in and then revealed the real cost of the bargain. Your folly was in the belief that you can have something you did not earn; that you are entitled to that which you did not earn; that you willingly allowed someone else to think for you. Your failure to research, study and inform yourself permitted reason to escape you. You have entered into a trap from which you cannot flee. Your only chance of freedom is if your new Master gives it to you. A freedom that is given can also be taken away; therefore, it is not freedom.” With that, I tore up the napkin and placed it before the astonished young man. “This is the nature of your new health care legislation.”

I turned away to leave these few in thought and contemplation and was surprised by applause. The elderly gentleman, who was clearly entertained, shook my hand enthusiastically and said, “Thank you Sir, these kids don’t understand Liberty these days.” He refused to allow me to pay my bill as he said, “You earned this one, it is an honor to pickup the tab.” I shook his hand in thanks, leaving the restaurant somewhat humbled, and sensing a glimmer of hope for my beloved country.

Use reason,
Clifford A Wright

Feel free to share.

ACCELERATION PUT INTO PERSPECTIVE

Thought you all might enjoy this. I am sure you wil understand it better than I ever will.

We have come a long way since the Model T. I had seen this before but it is still an interesting explanation of acceleration.


Acceleration Explained

Here's some food for thought....

This is really amazing when you stop and think about it.

Incredible

*If you thought Top Fuel Dragsters were fast (over 300 mph in less than 5
seconds), this really puts it into perspective. This came from a guy that makes connecting rods for the racing industry.*

ACCELERATION PUT INTO PERSPECTIVE...

* One Top Fuel dragster outfitted with a 500 cubic-inch Hemi engine makes more horsepower (8,000 HP) than the first 4 rows at NASCAR's Daytona 500.

* Under full throttle, a dragster engine will
consume 11.2 gallons of nitro methane per second; a fully loaded

Boeing 747 consumes jet fuel at the same rate but with 25% less energy being produced.

* A stock Dodge Hemi V8 engine cannot produce enough power to merely drive
the dragster's supercharger.

* With 3000 CFM of air being rammed in by the supercharger on overdrive, the
fuel mixture is compressed into a near-solid form before ignition. Cylinders
run on the verge of hydraulic lockup at full throttle.

* At the stoichiometric 1.7:1 air/fuel mixture for nitro methane the flame
front temperature measures 7050 degrees F.

* Nitro methane burns yellow. The spectacular white flame seen above the
stacks at night is raw burning hydrogen, dissociated from atmospheric water vapor by the searing exhaust gases.

* Dual magnetos supply 44 amps to each sparkplug, which is typically the output of an electric arc welder in each cylinder.

* Spark plug electrodes are totally consumed during a pass..

*After 1/2 way thru the run, the engine is 'dieseling' from compression and
the glow of the exhaust valves at 1400 degrees F. The engine can only be shut down by cutting the fuel flow....

* If spark momentarily fails early in the run, unburned nitro builds up in
the affected cylinders and then explodes with enough force sufficient to
blow the cylinder heads off the block in pieces or split the block in half !!

* Top fuel dragsters reach over 300 MPH +... before you have completed reading this sentence.

* In order to exceed 300 MPH in 4.5 seconds, a dragster must accelerate an
average of over 4 G's. In order to reach 200 MPH well before reaching half-track, at launch the acceleration approaches 8 G's.

* Top Fuel engines turn approximately 540 revolutions from light to light!

* Including the burnout, the engine must only survive 9000 revolutions under load.

* The redline is actually quite high at 9500 RPM.

* THE BOTTOM LINE: Assuming all the equipment is paid for,
the pit crew is working for free, & NOTHING BLOWS UP, each run will cost an
estimated $1000 per second.

0 to 100 MPH in .8 seconds (the first 60 feet of the run).

0 to 200 MPH in 2.2 seconds (the first 350 feet of the run).

6 g-forces at the starting line (nothing accelerates faster on land).

6 negative g-forces upon deployment of twin 'chutes at 300 MPH.

An NHRA Top Fuel Dragster accelerates quicker than any other land vehicle on
earth . . . quicker than a jet fighter plane . . . quicker than the space shuttle....or snapping your fingers!!

The current Top Fuel dragster elapsed time record is 4.420
seconds for the quarter-mile (2004, Doug Kalitta). The top speed record is
337.58 MPH as measured over the last 66' of the run (2005, Tony Schumacher).

So, in summary...Let's now put this all into perspective:


Imagine this.....You are driving a new $140,000 Lingenfelter
twin-turbo powered Corvette Z-06. Over a mile up the road, a Top Fuel
dragster is staged & ready to 'launch' down a quarter-mile strip as you
pass. You have the advantage of a flying start. You run the 'Vette hard, on
up through the gears and blast across the starting line, and pass the
dragster at an honest 200 MPH.... The 'tree' goes green for both of you at
that exact moment. The dragster departs & starts after you.

You keep your foot buried hard to the floor, and suddenly you hear an
incredibly brutally screaming whine that sears and pummels your eardrums &
within a mere 3 seconds the dragster effortlessly catches & passes you. He
beats you to the finish line, a quarter-mile away from where you just passed him.

Think about it - from a standing start, the dragster had spotted you 200

MPH....and it not only caught, but nearly blasted you off the planet when he
passed you within a mere 1320 foot long race !!!!

Now that, my friend . . . . . is acceleration!

Thursday, August 18, 2011

THE GREEN THING...

In the line at the store, the cashier told an older woman that she should bring her own grocery bags because plastic bags weren't good for the environment.

The woman apologized to him and explained, "We didn't have the green thing back in my day."

The clerk responded, "That's our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment."

He was right -- our generation didn't have the green thing in its day.

Back then, we returned milk bottles, soda bottles and other bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over. So they really were recycled.

But we didn't have the green thing back in our day.

We walked up stairs, because we didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. We walked to the corner store and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time we had to go two blocks.

But she was right. We didn't have the green thing in our day.

Back then, we washed the baby's diapers because we didn't have the throw-away kind. We dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 220 volts -- wind and solar power really did dry the clothes. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing. But that old lady is right; we didn't have the green thing back in our day.

Back then, we had one TV and one radio in the house -- not a TV in every room. And the TV showed only black and white images and had a small screen not much bigger than a handkerchief (remember them?), not a screen the size of the state of Montana.



In the kitchen, we blended and stirred by hand because we didn't have electric machines to do everything for her.



When we packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, we used a wadded up old newspaper to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.



Back then, we didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. We used a push mower that ran on human power. We exercised by working so we didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.

But she's right; we didn't have the green thing back then.



We drank from a fountain when we were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time we had a drink of water.


We refilled writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and we replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull.

But we didn't have the green thing back then.

Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or walked instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service.

We had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And we didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.

But isn't it sad the current generation laments how wasteful we old folks were just because we didn't have the green thing back then?